You’re very perceptive. You’ve come this far without letting anyone break through your emotional wall.
But because you have only used that skill (so far) to get what you needed, you limited yourself from seeing the whole truth.
You wanted to protect yourself from talking about how you felt, and you did.
You looked into people’s eyes, listened to their voices, and watched their faces. You figured out how to stop them from pressing.
But that’s where you stopped. You didn’t think about what they were going to do when they weren’t thinking about you.
Lots of people do care about you, but they also have their own lives to live.
Eventually, they have to move on and live them.
Eventually, that leaves you all alone.
You thought that’s where you wanted to be, but when you finally got there, it wasn’t the truth.